After returning to the country earlier this month to promote his first horror film Kampon at the 49th Metro Manila Film Festival, actor Derek Ramsay admitted he is still reeling from his wife Ellen Adarna’s miscarriage during their family trip to Spain last month.

“It was only for a few weeks but it was nothing that’s like hit me before. I’ve gone through so many things but that was… I don’t know how to describe it. I was lost. The good news is hindi kami baog (laughs). Di ba? Para at least we know we can have a baby. So right now hindi na ako picky, boy, girl, as long as healthy. She wants a girl. The entire country wants a girl. I’m okay with having a girl now. But I told Ellen, she’s going to be super sheltered, she’s going to be super protected, and she’s going to be super manly (laughs),” he told PUSH in an exclusive interview during the MMFF Parade of Stars event. 

READ: Derek Ramsay reveals Ellen Adarna suffered a miscarriage

Derek said he is already looking forward to starting off 2024 as it is another chance for him and his wife to grow their family. 

“I’m very blessed. I’m very, very happy. But if I’m blessed with another child with Ellen, I don’t want to say this but my life would be perfect. She was pregnant in Spain. And it took a while for me to absorb it. Honestly, I haven’t given that thought. It’s a good question. I’ve been really lutang. Imagine the rollercoaster of emotions. We’re in Spain for my mom’s birthday, we’re celebrating. We find out. We’re on a high. Then on the following day, she starts spotting. We talked to doctors left and right. All of them say, ‘We can’t say what’s going on.’ Even when we did the ultrasound, the doctors still couldn’t say that she’s not pregnant. But 99% siguro hindi na matutuloy. So yeah I was lost.

"Like kami actually ni Ellen parang yung hindi nagpapansinan, not on purpose. To be honest, yesterday was the first day that we actually had quality time, just the two of us, as a couple, without talking about it but alam mo na it’s there. And we took care of one another. Because there’s been so many things, Elias is there, Elias’s recital, and Elias’s christmas party, so we’re there for him. Yesterday was the first. So today I feel lighter,” he shared. 

READ: Ellen Adarna on taking a break from acting, pregnancy plans

Set to leave the country again during the holidays to spend New Year in Norway with Ellen’s side of the family, the Kampon star revealed that he and Ellen are leaving again in February for their anniversary trip to Antartica.

“We were in Spain for my mom’s birthday in Barcelona. And then we are going to Norway for New Year’s with the Adarna family. And then we come back here and then we go again to Antartica in February. That’s for the celebration of our anniversary. Why Antartica? Kasi it’s on her bucket list. Our anniversary was in November and I was like, ‘What do I give this girl? Do I really want to go to Antartica?’ Because last year we spent it in the North Pole. So this year sa South Pole. I decided to kill two birds with one stone. She loves Antartica and she loves Patagonia, so we’re going to both,” he shared. 

Even after a whirlwind romance which had them walking down the aisle after a year of dating, Derek said his bond with Ellen is just so strong.

“I can feel when she’s going through something. She feels when i’m going through something. And when I’m down it brings her down. And when she’s down, it brings me down. So we’re really there for one another and we can feel each other’s energy. So we’re really looking forward to this trip and maybe it’s a blessing na rin, because we have these trips and that happened. Maybe we’ll create an ice baby in Antartica because for some reason my wife loves the cold and I’m a coconut, I love this (tropical) weather. But we’ll be in Antartica, just the two of us. So maybe we’ll produce an ice, ice baby,” he said.